Real Fake
The images so clear
So real
Yet… so fake
I see it
But it doesn’t mean its here
I hear it
But it doesn’t mean its here
Because I can’t feel it
I know it isn’t real
Because I want it
I know it isn’t there
Because I need it
I know it never will be
by Matthew Henrickson
“Too Late”
It’s too late
Can’t go back and change it
It’s too late
Got to live with it
It’s too late
Like always your timing was off
It’s too late
Don’t know how to go on without you
It’s too late
Wanting you back here with me
It’s too late
Can’t have you now
It’s too late
by Matthew Henrickson
This is one of my most recent poems I wrote. I had been thinking of something to write about him for a little while, and before going to the funeral it came to me. It seems like we talk about him everyday, almost like he’s not even gone.
Lawrence
May 22, 2007
My first memories of you
Are around the dinner table
As you said a prayer for me and my family…
And now I am praying for yours
You left them with one simple question “why?”
Why you chose to leave them
Now those who love you
Are wishing you were here
And you would come back to them…
Everything would be the same.
Your broken heart can no longer break
As you lay to rest
Your four angels surround you
Just as you are with them
Now they can be with you too.
Your big and loveable heart
Gave hope to others
They would turn to you for answers
For comfort
For support
I’m sorry…
That no one could do that for you.
You will be missed by all that knew you
by Matthew Henrickson
“Sorry…”
I’m sorry for everything I should have said
For what I didn’t say
For what I shouldn’t have said
And I did
I didn’t know how to handle us
So I made mistakes
And I can only tell you that I’m sorry
I’m sorry for leaving you when I shouldn’t have
Sorry for being there when you wanted to be alone
Sorry for it all
Sorry for the fights you always won
Sorry for not fighting when I should have
I’m sorry for forgetting when you wanted me to remember
Sorry for remembering when I should have forgotten
Sorry for buying you the wrong gifts
And not buying the right ones
I’m sorry
I’m sorry for being wrong when I should of been right
And sorry for being right when I was supposed to be wrong
I’m sorry for never letting you have your way
I’m sorry for drinking when I shouldn’t have
For not being sober like you wanted
You always knew best
I’m sorry for not listening
I’m sorry for loving you so much that I made these mistakes
Blinded by love… I’m sorry
I’m sorry for loving you when you didn’t want me to…
I’m sorry for not loving you right…
I’m sorry for not knowing how to love….
I’m sorry… for being sorry
Risk of My Heart
I’m afraid to talk to you
At my hearts risk
I’m afraid to open up to you
So the pain doesn’t flow in
I’m afraid of life…
Because I can’t lose
I’m afraid of moving on
Because your memory still thrives in my mind
I’m afraid of tomorrow
Because of yesterday
I’m afraid to wake up today
Because it will never be the same
I’m afraid we won’t be together
Because we aren’t now
I’m afraid to chase after you
Because I fell
I’m afraid you got away
Because you ran too fast for me
I’m afraid you’ll get away
Because I didn’t have the right thing to say
by Matthew Henrickson
“Lets pretend”
Let’s pretend we are happy…
Ignore how we truly feel
Let’s pretend we aren’t hurt
It’s easier not to
Let’s pretend that you are by my side
It’s hard to be strong enough for two
Let’s pretend that life isn’t hard
So we don’t show our weakness
Let’s pretend we are in it together
It’s lonely being alone
Let’s pretend we are someone else
So no one knows who we really are
Let’s pretend the past doesn’t matter
Our bad memories keep me up at night
Let’s pretend I don’t miss you
It’s hard not to be missed back
Let’s pretend we are perfect together
And ignore that we always fight
Let’s pretend we aren’t in love
It hurts too much
Let’s pretend we aren’t pretending
by Matthew Henrickson
“Because You Can’t”
I miss you when I’m awake
And when I sleep
I miss you when you’re next to me
Or when I’m holding you
Because I know soon I’ll be nothing again
You’ll once more look past me
Not because you don’t love me
Just because you can’t
Because you won’t
I miss you when I’m awake
And when I’m asleep
I miss you always
Because you’re not mine like you used to be…
You belong elsewhere… which isn’t with me
Not because you don’t love me
Just because you can’t
Because you won’t
I’ve always missed you
Awake or Asleep
Reality or in Dreams…
Ever since I lost you
When I realized how much you are of me
When I realized… too late
I love you when I’m awake
And I love you when I’m asleep
I love you even though you can’t love me
And even though you won’t
“A Piece of my Love”
No strings attached
Ill give you love tonight
Even if we don’t love each other
Magic on our fingertips
Sweetness on our tender lips
Passion with each breath we take
I know tonight will be a special night
Feeling ecstasy before you touch me
Just by having you by my side
Hearing your heart beat
And feeling you quiver at my touch
Tonight will last always in my memory
Giving you a piece of my love
Of my heart
A piece of me
Tonight
By Matthew Henrickson
“Words of Beauty”
January 15th, 2004
My beautiful words, speak for my heart
Surprisingly not waiting for yours
Expected nothing, but nothing…
Then you can no longer disappointment me
My memories I can’t let go
Even If I wanted…
Providing comfort and pain,
In one thought.
My beautiful words, will no longer be said
My heart to remain broken
Silencing my words
Keeping them to myself
I know you don’t care for them…
As I remain quiet
It burns my throat
And stings my heart
My beautiful words…
Are no longer words
Just the past…
And now just thoughts.
by Matthew Henrickson
